Army Stops Many Soldiers From Quitting
Orders Extend Enlistments to Curtail Troop Shortages

By Lee Hockstader
Washington Post Staff Writer

According to their contracts, expectations and desires, all three soldiers should have been civilians by now. On their Army paychecks, the expiration date of their military service is now listed sometime after 2030 -- the payroll computer's way of saying, "Who knows?"

The three are among thousands of soldiers forbidden to leave military service under the Army's "stop-loss" orders ... 

The Army alone has blocked the possible retirements and departures of more than 40,000 soldiers.

By prohibiting soldiers and officers from leaving the service at retirement or the expiration of their contracts, military leaders have breached the Army's manpower limit of 480,000 troops, a ceiling set by Congress.

 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

RUDYARD KIPLING

1865-1936

Take up the White Man's burden--

Ye dare not stoop to less--

Nor call too loud on Freedom

To cloak your weariness.

By all ye will or whisper,

By all ye leave or do,

The silent sullen peoples

Shall weigh your God and you.

 

GLOUCESTER, Mass. - A woman believed to have died after a house fire has been discovered alive in a Boston hospital.

Relatives of Susan Anderson had already had the body they believed was hers cremated, and they had arranged for her obituary to appear Monday in The Gloucester Times.

The state Medical Examiner's office identified the woman who died as Anderson ...

                         

FBI urges police to watch for people carrying almanacs

TED BRIDIS, Associated Press Writer

12-29) 12:54 PST WASHINGTON (AP) --

The FBI is warning police nationwide to be alert for people carrying almanacs, cautioning that the popular reference books covering everything from abbreviations to weather trends could be used for terrorist planning.

In a bulletin sent Christmas Eve to about 18,000 police organizations, the FBI said terrorists may use almanacs "to assist with target selection and pre-operational planning."

It urged officers to watch during searches, traffic stops and other investigations for anyone carrying almanacs ...

 

Groom Killed By Stripper's Boobs

GENEVA - A fun-filled bachelor party at a strip club turned deadly when a 32-year-old groom-to-be who was enjoying the attentions of a well-endowed stripper suffocated while his face was buried in her breasts

One of the strippers, Kandy Kane, got too into her performance and suffocated the man between her 72-DD breasts

"Who could have known that when he was waving his hands around, he was signaling for help?"

RIYADH (Reuters) - Morality police in southern Saudi Arabia plan to conduct raids to ensure that shops do not sell flowers, candles and gifts to those planning to celebrate New Year.

The Authority for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice (APVPV) in Aseer province was determined to uphold a ban by the conservative Muslim kingdom on non-Muslim celebrations.

"Patrols will be dispatched to gift and flower shops in the next two days before the New Year to ensure that ornaments are not sold for New Year celebrations."

 

Top sperm donors are Gorm, Olaf, Birk & Thor

By Elinor Schang

Aarhus, Denmark - Danes are spreading their genes around the world faster than ever aided by exports from local firm Cryos International, the world's biggest sperm bank.

Each year Danish men donate sperm that contributes to around 1 000 pregnancies, and with increasing demand from Americans, Cryos has opened its first New York office - on Broadway.

A highly secularised country, Denmark has removed many taboos which make donations awkward in other countries

Michael Jackson Speaks Out

(CBS) Michael Jackson says it’s still okay to share his bed with children.

He says that while he was in police custody, officers locked him in a feces-smeared bathroom for 45 minutes in order to belittle him and take away his pride.

"There was doo doo - feces - thrown all over the walls, the floor, the ceiling," he tells  Ed Bradley. "And it stunk so bad. Then one of the policemen came by the window. And he made a sarcastic remark... 'How do you like the smell? Is it good?'"

He also says the police handcuffed him in such a way so as to hurt his back. "Now I can't move," he tells Bradley, and the injury "keeps me from sleeping at night.